Welcome to Steve’s Aspie Adventures



Whether you are reading this as a parent, carer, friend or are on the spectrum yourself, a warm welcome to the blog and I’d welcome your comments. I was diagnosed with an autism spectrum condition as a teenager. Throughout my life this has brought unique challenges, deep lows but also very happy times. I hope with this blog I can share some of my experiences, challenges and successes with you. My hope is that it can help along the way at breaking down some of the fears, misconceptions, stereotypes that come hand in hand with Autism by giving an insight into what it’s like as an individual living with the condition.

At times when I’m affected most by my condition life can grind to a halt, but that has given me a drive to experience all I can when I’m feeling well. Travel brings a new perspective on life and the experiences it brings have made my good days even better and given hope in my bad days. For me it’s a metaphorical middle finger to a life-long condition. In my other blog (The Adventures of Steve) I share some stories of my travel and adventures.

I hope you enjoy reading this blog. Feel free to share this with your friends if you've found it helpful. I'd love to hear your thoughts, any topics you'd like to read about and own experiences so please comment or message me.


Please note, that in all my blog entries I can only relay my personal experiences and perspective. It is important to remember that every single person on the spectrum is an individual with a different story to mine. I have no medical expertise or training and am writing to share my personal experiences only.


Friday, 31 October 2014

10 Phrases that mean something very different to aspies


It's not a secret that I take things very literally. It's a common trait for us aspies to not understand when something is

meant to be taken seriously or is just a saying, and this can create some confusion. What might be just a simple request or statement can lead me to blankly staring at you with a quizzical expression on my face or partaking in some rather bizarre behaviour. But why? We've got our wonderfully quirky and bizarre language to thank for that! Have you ever stopped and thought about how random some of our everyday sayings are? This week I've compiled a list of the 10 sayings that mean something very different to my literal way of thinking. So lets get started, make yourself comfortable and...

1. Take a seat...

Take it where? Why would you want me to take a seat, is that not stealing? Oh, I guess that you want me to be seated so I'll sit down. That's when you say...

2. You alright?

Why wouldn't I be alright? Ah yes this is just a greeting, umm what's the correct response....'you alright mate?' - of course, silly me, but I'd still like to answer your random greeting-question and actually tell you if I'm alright. You try and make things better by saying...

3. Every cloud has a silver lining...

Well no they don't. Clouds aren't known for their silver content, you never tend to hear weather forecasts warning of low pressure systems bringing in heavy silver accumulation, turning to gold at high altitude. That would certainly make jewellery cheaper. Speaking of the weather it is raining hard today. Yes you say...

3. It's raining cats and dogs....

No, it's definitely not. It's raining water. How are you mistaking that wet stuff out there to be furry pets? It's not unheard of for there to be isolated fish or frog showers but not cats and dogs. Do you need to 'take a seat' as you say, I think you might be hallucinating. You don't seem impressed with my observations and tell me to...

6. Put a sock in it...

Put a sock in what? What purpose will putting my socks anywhere other than on my feet have exactly? I guess I better take my socks off and wait for further instructions. You seem exasperated and tell me to stop wasting time and...

4. Pull your socks up...

Whoa, now you just told me to put my socks in something and now you're cross because you want me to pull them up? Seriously dude, what's your fascination with my socks? As I put them back on you notice how great they look ( I have fabulous socks!) and compliment them by saying that they're...

7. The bees knees...

No, they're not. There is no comparison between bees knees and anything other than bees knees. How my fantastic socks (or indeed anything else) could be described as being 'the bees knees' is beyond me. Knees aren't even a bee's best feature. I'd go for their bright colours or efficient pollen collection ability. Why then is it OK for you to compare my splendid socks with bees knees but I'd be the odd one if I say 'hey Jimmy I think your new phone is as great as a bees pollen collection ability!' Actually this is what I might start to say from now on. You laugh and say I'm...

8. taking the piss...

Right so lets use my powers of deduction here, by 'taking the seat' you meant 'sit down' so by 'taking the piss' you want me to sit in the..... oh..... Yeurgh. WHY WOULD YOU ASK THAT?!

No! you say, it means you were being silly; you put me right about this one fast and tell me to...

9. Lighten up...

You saying I'm fat.... well I guess I could do with getting a bit lighter, I have been eating a lot of cakes recently. No? That's not what you meant, Perhaps you want the room to 'lighten up' I'll turn on the lamp. Anyway now it's now coming to the end of my blog post, We say our goodbyes and as I leave the room you say...

10. Break a leg

Charming...



Thank you for taking the time to read this list. I'd love to hear your stories about taking things literally. Perhaps you have some funny stories or experiences to share. Please feel free to comment and share this post.

7 comments:

  1. People say "have a good one" I want to know "a good one what?"-people that say "my friend" or "buddy" or "pal" when they do not know me personally is very annoying to me

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    1. Have a Good Day is have a good one :) ha ha or how about when they say Bro. that is annoying too

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  2. Jokes,I don't get jokes unless I tell them, and then not all the time.

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  3. I take everything literally the first time, but then I learn that it has a 2nd meaning that needs attributing to it and log it for the next time. I even use metaphors on occasion. However, I still have to think about it, it doesn't come naturally, and I have to understand why, where it comes from before I would consider using it.

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  4. Once as a kid I was with my grandma and I was being hyper and she told me to "cool it" I brought her a cup of ice... She thought I was trying to be a "smart ass" (as if that could actually be smart) I honestly thought she wanted me to cool something off.... What better way to cool something than with ice, right?

    I also never understood how you can "kill time" or "waste electricity" Why do American football players "eat the clock"? (guess they are hungry) the saying "hide and watch" used to scare me because I didn't know why I needed to hide. I didn't understand how I was supposed to "hold my horses" They weigh more than I do, and besides I didn't have any to hold. I got called a "jackass" a few times... (I am most certainly NOT a donkey...) I could go on all night.... If it could possibly be taken for a literal meaning, I probably did at least at one point take it for it's literal meaning...

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  5. This just completely made my night :)

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  6. Calling an adult with whom you are in a romantic relationship an infant as an endearment. No one in my close famiy used "baby" or "babe" as a pet name so I wasn't conditioned to it. I am 4'11" (150 cm) and 95 lbs and stopped getting the kid's menu when I was 18 and happened to go in and ask for our table while Dad was still helping Mom into her wheelchair. I'm now 36 and people still think I am a teenager- I've had waiters change the way they speak to me after I order a drink and show my card. Once when I was deciding whether or not to have wine the waitress was changing her speech so much when she got to me (Dad having been raised by his Southern grandparents and enough Aspie traits that the waiter doesn't get to go around the table but instead Dad essentially calls role from the oldest generation's females down to me, then the males by generation (my mother and aunts, and he and my uncle, order by convenient place at the table at leas... what was I talking about again? Oh yeah...) When the waitress came to me her voice and body language changed enough to throw me off kilter, so I ordered wine so that for the rest of the meal I could predict her interactions with me based on how she treated the others. The female friend I met online doesn't know my size, and I know she calls our mutual friends, people she knows are older than me, in the group private message list "Babe." And after over 2 years it still throws me for a moment

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